I have done this for 26 years. I am not going to waste your time.

I did not set out to build a practice around men who hate therapy. It built itself. Guys came in because someone told them to, sat down braced for something soft, and found a conversation instead. Then their friend came. Then their brother. Then their wife wanted the two of them to come together.

“My core work is with men who don’t like therapy and with the couples around them. That’s the niche, and it’s deliberate.”

I understand the resistance from the inside. Hell, I hate asking for help. I hate it so much that I’ll endure unimaginable distress to appear like I have it in control. So I am not going to pretend the ask was easy, and I am not going to congratulate you for six minutes about making the call.

Fear is part of the process. Any time we move from something we know to something we don’t, fear is present. Courage can only grow where fear is present. If you were not nervous about this, there would be nothing here to grow.

Only one kind of person goes to therapy. Courageous people go to therapy.

The male identity is derived from competent action. Doing things, and doing them well. That is not a slogan about toughness. It means the skill we are after is concrete: having the hard conversation with your partner, and having it well. Sitting in a room with your own anger and handling it well. Competence you can actually feel.

The first session is mostly about rapport and fit. Not intake paperwork, not a checklist read aloud at you. We talk. You find out what I am like and whether you can stand being honest with me. I find out what you are carrying and whether I am the right person to help you carry it.

If we are not a fit, I will say so, and I will point you somewhere useful. That is not a failure. It is the whole reason the first hour exists.

I talk. I ask direct questions and I expect direct answers. I will not sit in silence waiting for you to fill it, and I will not soften a thing that needs to be said plainly. If I think you are avoiding something, I will name it.

I will also tell you when you are right, and I will not manufacture problems to keep you in a chair. My job is to advocate for your growth. Sometimes that is uncomfortable. Growth usually is.

You will get pushed. You will not get lectured, and you will not get a version of masculinity handed to you. What you do with your life is yours. I help you get competent at the parts that are not working.